The worm that turned
I had this strange expression come to mind as I sat down to write today: the worm that turned. It's a lovely expression, isn't it? Suddenly the menial worm becomes something mighty; the soft, unexpected rhyming echoes the phrase's sentiment of rebellion. I typed it into Google (as I often do with this newsletter, if I'm being honest, just to check I haven't horribly misinterpreted some word) and, pleasingly, I got several great hits.
The first, a shop in Nottingham. Having lived in Nottingham for five years during medical school, I passed this shop front often several times a week. It always caught my eye with the lovely curly-wormy font on its sign. I was sure it had closed; how nice to see it up and running still.
The second hit on Google, The Two Ronnies. Now, I seem to remember my dad talking about this comedy show from the '70s. It seems they wrote a dystopian comedy called The Worm That Turned set in - wait for it - 2012. How futuristic! In this far-off future, gender roles are reversed (apparently) and “men are housekeepers and wear women's clothes, and law and order is managed by female guards in boots and hot pants" (Two Ronnies Fandom webpage).
Thankfully, the third hit on Google spoke about the origins of the phrase. Apparently the phrase was first written in a set of proverbs by English writer, John Heywood, back in 1546: "Treade a worme on the tayle, and it must turne agayne". Basically, this idiom explains how we all have our limits. If we are repeatedly pushed, we will eventually rebel, seek revenge - or find our voice.
When I was younger, I wrote a silly short story in the car on the long journey up to visit my Granny in Yorkshire. It was called ‘Michelin the Hairy Maggot’. Imagine the Michelin man, with his tyre-like rolls, as a hairy maggot. To me, "the worm that turned" reminds me of him: the meek and lowly worm suddenly deciding to take its protein pills, puff up its chest and, perhaps for the first time, finds its voice.
We all have a breaking point. But, as in the words of Leonard Cohen, “the crack is where the light gets in”.
We can carry this metaphor over to begin to consider what it might take for us to “turne agayne”. What injustice might finally make you speak out? What unhealthy relationships need to finally be shed of their skin? What are your soft boundaries, and what are the hard boundaries; the non-negotiables? What circumstances would make you find your voice? What series of small events, when repeated, might just start to dent your armour?
Mindful moment: I think most of us probably want to avoid (or is this just me as an avoidant personality consoling myself?) reaching this breaking point. Instead of this Transformers-like sudden shift, we might be able to seek out what we need earlier on. With every day that passes, we are learning: about ourselves, about others; about our buttons and boundaries. I believe we can avoid deep conflict and harmful rebellion by being honest. Sometimes, the bravery needed to speak up takes time, age and experience to grow. Oftentimes, it's difficult to be honest with ourselves about how we feel. Notice those small moments which feel uncomfortable- the minor transgessions; the bending of our personal boundaries - and ask yourself if you can speak out now to stop those becoming all-consuming, life-altering forces. Do not get to the point where you have been trodden on so many times you have no choice but to suddenly turn, in some dramatic, deep-uprooting of the soil. Listen to what matters to you; notice who and what and where your boundaries are being pushed; honour that inner voice. Every day decisions can act as small course-corrections to avoid something altogether more upsetting in the future.
Love, Laura
Have we met?
Welcome to the Community.
I'm Laura, a yoga teacher and NHS doctor. With this weekly newsletter I aim to help you incorporate mindful moments into your week. I want you to feel inspired, empowered and creative. I promise to always be authentic; to only include content that speaks to me and which, therefore, I hope will do the same for you.
If you enjoyed reading this, then please consider sharing it with a friend!