Running to run away?
Guys, why do we run?
For the last seven days, I have run every day. I know I’m not going to win any awards for that; no-one’s going to do an adventure documentary about me to show at the Banff film festival - but maybe they should! We don’t need to do extraordinary stuff to be extra-ordinary.
I’m going to list for you the pros and cons of running every day. I was maybe going to make this into an Instagram reel but Mark and I have been talking recently about how social media is likely to be the cigarettes-causing-cancer equivalent in twenty years’ time (where the cancer is depression and anxiety) and so now I’ve got undecided feelings about Instagram. So, I’m writing things down here instead.
Pros.
1. Honestly, I feel great. The BMJ have published MULTIPLE studies showing that exercise is as effective as anti-depressants. Read that again. I would argue (having sampled both) that it is more effective - faster-acting and longer-lasting.
2. I know this is probably more like 1a) but I have improved self-esteem. I.e. I feel better about myself and my body - I feel capable, strong and pleased at what I’ve been able to do for myself having set out the goal to do it.
3. I have more energy. So many times over the last week you will have seen my pre-run story of setting myself up just to do a short and slow run because I was feeling sleepy, and then going out and getting some great times! This is probably because I confused lethargy with fatigue. Running makes me feel a bit hyper, I’ll be honest. What’s interesting is all those times I thought I was tired but I actually had a lot of pent-up emotion that just needed pounding out on the streets.
4. I am more creative. Guys, it’s Wednesday and I'm writing! Once reserved as a once-a-week wonder, I feel so much more open to regular creativity. I’m putting that down to the fact that exercise helps us to access flow state. It also clears our minds of those inane, every day thoughts - much like a daily toilet habit, or Julia Cameron’s Morning Pages (I am loathe to include those two things side-by-side in the same sentence) - giving way, instead, to new ideas.
5. On that note, my IBS (irritable bowel) is so much better! I mean, this makes complete sense because movement and deep breathing improves our body’s ability to digest (through vagal innervation of the gut) but it’s been such a blessing to not feel uncomfortable or bloated.
6. I’m more motivated to eat and drink well. The day before a longer run, half or full marathons, I’m mindful to drink at least 2L of water. Equally, food becomes about fuelling. I’m not the best eater in the world, and many people might feel jealous of the fact that I can easily forget to plan meals, but knowing that I need to fuel my body in the right way to sustain my energy has been so helpful to me. I’m more mindful of mealtimes as I need to make sure I’m not eating too close to a run (although yesterday’s mince pie and dash went surprisingly well after the first slightly stitch-y five minutes).
7. You realise you’re capable of more than you think. I wrote about this after I ran the London marathon last year (nbd) and how we are often able to do so much more than we give ourselves credit for. Why can’t you run every day? If you are lucky enough to have working, moving legs then why not? Give yourself a little more credit. Remember: you can do hard things. And if you need to, just walk.
Cons.
1. People keep warning me about injury. They say it’s not great to run every day. I think you will always find people on both sides of this argument. The inimitable Haruki Murakami (What I Talk About When I Talk About Running) runs every day, even now he is in his 80s. I think generally cross-fitness is important - stretching and strengthening, so as with most things in life, it’s about finding that balance.
2. Too much yang. I noticed when I went for acupuncture yesterday that I was feeling a bit hyper. Apparently, our internalised capitalism has encouraged us all to celebrate being busy and I was feeling pleasantly hyped by constantly being on the go. But being in the stillness of the acupuncture room, lying face down with twenty needles in my back, I realised that I’ve been all yang and no yin. I’d been embracing Matthew McConaughey’s Greenlights and keeping the foot on the accelerator through all the crossroads. I realised I needed to find a bit more of that soft, feminine, yin-ness - the one that nurtures, and slows and softens our edges.
3. What happens when we stop? Do you remember that time in season one of Friends where Phoebe dates that psychiatrist, Roger, who psycho-analyses them all? He tells Chandler he “wouldn’t want to be there when the laughter stops”. Well, there’s a part of me that’s getting a bit addicted to the high of running and I’m nervous for what happens when the running stops. I’m in two minds, because I think so few of us do enough exercise and we need to remember that the human body was built to run. If we generally aren’t moving enough, then surely daily running is only a good thing? As a wise friend said to me recently: “it’s not what you do, it’s how you do it”. Our intention is so, so important. Are we doing it to beat ourselves up? Or are we doing it to celebrate our living, breathing bodies? Are we reminding ourselves of our self-worth and the movement our bodies deserve, or are we holding ourselves to rigidly to principle and protocol and promises that we no longer wish to keep?
One of my favourite anecdotes is about the people in an ashram in India who ask their guru if it is acceptable for them to go down the road to get ice cream. The guru asks them how they would feel if went there wanting chocolate ice cream but the shop happens to be sold out. If this doesn’t bother them, then they can go for ice cream. However, if they are going to feel upset or angry or annoyed the chocolate ice cream is sold out, then perhaps they shouldn’t go.
The point is, when we recognise we are already whole, perfect and complete - as the yoga philosophy teaches us - then outcomes are irrelevant and we can remain contentedly unattached from them. If we are going to feel miserable or angry or self-berating if we don’t e.g. exercise today, then perhaps we need to go back to the drawing board and consider our motivations.
Mindful moment: I hope that makes sense. Ultimately, I suppose, it doesn’t really matter whether we choose to run today or not: it matters what our intention is behind our decision. What matters is that we make decisions aligned with our values and we enter into a contract with ourselves to do our best to act in accordance with what we are worth.
Remember, we are not running away from our problems. We are running for ourselves and towards a future in which we consider bodies and minds worthy of the act.
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Welcome to the Community.
I'm Laura, a yoga teacher and NHS doctor. With this weekly newsletter I aim to help you incorporate mindful moments into your week. I want you to feel inspired, empowered and creative. I promise to always be authentic; to only include content that speaks to me and which, therefore, I hope will do the same for you.
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